Parivaar

Directed by: Shashilal K. Nair

Starring: Mithun Chakraborthy, Meenakshi Sheshadri, Shakti Kapoor

Released: 1987

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

A film about a tightly knot family consisting of a man, two orphans, a monkey and a dog. Yes, you heard right. And if the children´s tears leave you cool, the crying dog and sobbing monkey will make up for it (maybe). But here we are running too much ahead....

Birju is an honest con artist, who is raising two children, whom he both had found as babies trown away by their parents. To earn a living for them, himself and two faithful beasts – a monkey and a German sheperd dog, he slogs day and night, but never complains, because the closeness and love between all the members of this curious parivaar makes up for all the possible hardships. Where would Birju find a time for love? However a fate brings love straight to his home. Being thrown out of the house by her in-laws because of in-suficient dowry, a young woman Anita tries to commit suicide, but is rescued by the joint effort of the two small kids and their two animal companions (let´s not question the near impossibility of the deed, after all this film is not short of miracles and WTFs).

Looking high but happy.

She finds a comforting shelter in a poor hut Birju shares with his family, and taking the matters of the house into her own hands she seems to be completely happy and satisfied in the new sorroundings short of wealth but not of love and appreciation. But nothing is permanent and soon it seems that the parivaar shall be torn apart, because the dowry Anita had lost previously, is now found, and her husband would like to claim it...

The main leads are Mithun Chakraborthy and Meenakshi Sheshadri (I wanted to see the film for her, because it´s actually pretty difficult to find her films), and even though Meenakshi has less screen-space, she and her character prove that screen-space is not everything. Except for several dubbed crying scenes and rather brow-raising rescue by the children she is pleasant to watch. She has something that makes her different from other Indian actresses, and maybe because she doesn´t remind one of Sridevi in any way she got her share of success even during the greatest Sridevi craze in the mid-80s. Her dancing is amazing and in the song Ram Bakht Hanuman she expresses so much pain she feels (both mental and physical) your heart goes out to her.

The heart-stealer!

Mithun does the usual righteous, poor and lecturing others role, which I´ve seen him doing quite a few times already. He seems to be very comfortable with these kinds of characters and so delivers a good performance without much effort. The children, especially the girl, were good. The animals are way smarter then all the other famous beasts put together (yes, even more then the pigeon from Maine Pyar Kiya or Tuffy from Hum Aapke Hain Koun!) and they handle everything from offering in a mandir to driving a car to catch the bad guys.

Yo, problem?

The story itself is interesting enough and has substance, but could have been handled better, and the film overall suffers - from being an 80s film! Too many unnecessary scenes and subplots. Too many scenes in serious need of being shorter. Too many illogical things. Too many miracles. Some really WTF stuff (like when the monkey at the end turning into Hannuman and jumping all around, setting the place on fire). 

Hmm. Seems legit.

No disrespect to hinduism, but there was some serious and less then impressive overuse of godly interventions. And let-us-put-this-crap-into-it-as-well-it-will-be-rocking-like-hell ending action scene, in which for whatever reason is always the WHOLE cast including the two kids, the monkey and the dog.... the latter two save everybody´s sitting parts.

You shall not pass.

You shall not pass.

You shall not pass.

You guys watch too much Lord of the Rings!

Bobby

Directed by: Raj Kapoor

Starring: Rishi Kapoor, Dimple Kapadia, Pran, Prem Nath, Farida Jalal

Released: 1973

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

To people who started their Bollywood journey with the kinds of films like Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge, Maine Pyar Kiya or Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak, the basic story of „Bobby“ will not bring anything new. It is one of the films that needs to be seen in a context of its own time, when it was probably the first movie about teenage romance between a rich boy and a poor girl. Bobby was a trendsetter and as such it should be approached by the viewers today. Before they condemn the plot-line as „seen a million times“, they should realize that at the time of its release nobody has seen the plot yet...

Rishi in his pre-sweater era.

Debuting and sweet.

Wealthy with money but somehow deprived of family love, Mr. and Mrs. Nath send their little son Raj to be brought up in a boarding school in England, partly as a punishment for his willful childish behaviour and partly because they do not really want to bother with him (probably having no idea what to do with him either). So the kid grows up into a perfect 70s stylish Rishi Kapoor, a good and just boy who only longs for his parents´ appreciation. Upon his return home he is indeed welcomed by reasonably excited mum and dad, but just like when he was a child, he is largely left to himself. Up until a moment he spots a young girl on a party, and while the famous European classic Danube Waves melody plays in the background, he lets himself to be charmed. Soon he falls in love with Bobby (I was kinda confused when I found out that was a girl´s name, but whatever...) and she returns his feelings. 

The girl´s family is at first not excited about a rich guy getting involved with Bobby, fearing the reaction of his family, but thinking about the girl´s happiness and wishes they are willing even to bend their backs in front of her potential father-in-law. However the aristocratically snobby Pran accuses them of trying to ensnare his rich son to get money, and after some more insulting everything seems to be ruined for the young lovers. You know the routine. There is of course more to the film, including a song about a girl and a boy in a locked room, lovers getting hurt, lovers getting teary and lovers willing to sacrifice lives but not love. Rishi even gets his own towel scene, not that different from what his son would one day do in Saawariya. There is his father insulting her father some more and her father threatening his father afterwards. And there is the inevitable happy ending.

Rishi´s very own towel scene. Like father, like son....

 There is sweetness and freshness in the film, that somehow managed to overcome the years and charms as much as it did back then. It may be the Raj Kapoor´s direction or maybe Rishi Kapoor´s puppy eyes, or perhaps simplicity of debuting Dimple Kapadia, or maybe everything and more put together. A person not to be forgotten is Farida Jalal. One of the most loved „screen mothers“ appears only for several minutes, however such is an impact she makes as a mentally challenged girl, it is impossible to forget her. Pran of course, is as delightfully intense as ever, not exactly evil, but not a guy to be messed up with either.

Bobby was the main heroine, but I´m team Farida! She was heartbreaking.

Bobby is definitely, even today, a sweet romance of the best kind, succeeding in making nostalgic even those, who were born years after it first released.

Thank you

Directed by: Anees Bazmee

Starring: Akshay Kumar, Bobby Deol, Sonam Kapoor, Irrfan Khan, Rimi Sen, Suniel Shetty, Celina Jaitley

Released: 2011

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

I never have great expectations from Anees Bazmee, but he made it to a completely new level of turning me off with „Thank you“. The title itself is good for nothing, as it doesn´t really capture anything the films is about. But maybe that was the aim, because who would watch a film titled for example „Cheating on your partner is fun“ or „Immoral guide how to mislead the gullible females“? Because that is what you should expect if you ever have enough courage to hit the play button of this film.

Bobby, Irrfan and Suniel are three friends, all married (to Sonam, Rimi and Celina respectively) and all ungrateful kaminas, who will not let any opportunity to lift somebody´s skirt pass. Irrfan is the most experienced cheater, while Suniel and Bobby are learning from him. And it is all oh so much fun up until the moment Sonam (I really did not bother to remember the character´s names) starts suspecting something may stink in her little homely paradise. What to do? Her friend Rimi and Celina advice her to hire a detective, who will spy on Bobby and report his findings to her. And thus we are introduced to a saviour of marriages, protector of love, a true Mohabbat-man, Akshay Kumar. And he comes to them with a revelation – their husbands are bored.... What follows is anything but innovative line of women trying to humiliate their husbands and the husbands trying to conceal their affairs and turning against each other in attempts to save their own skin. If there is a humor in there somewhere, I guess I missed it.

The three kaminas

Plot-craters are plenty, music below-average and the moral of the story is either none (the better case) or puke-worthy (So it is OK and fun when husband cheats on his wife, but when a wife cheats on her husband it´s gross and major sin, but it is still the most right thing to do to teach your other half a lesson, after which you both have to forgive and love each other faithfully for the rest of eternity..... what?). And also, since women are just really dumb creatures, they need a man (Akshay) who has never met them before to tell them how to behave. While the thought of forgiving one affair remains an acceptable option (though not in the circumstances presented by the film), who would forgive a notorious cheater, who by the way treated you all your life like a piece of shit?

The three gulliable creatures (commonly reffered to as "women")

Already under water, the ship with the name „Thank you“ sinks even into greater depths of cringe-worthy under the weight of awful performances. Akshay Kumar does his usual with the change of not being funny at all. Irrfan Khan delivers with an ease some kinda funny one-liners, but overall is wasted. Suniel Shetty has more like a blink and miss appearance. Bobby Deol just doesn´t deliver in any department. Celina Jaitley is watchable, though has about ten minutes and ten sentences in the whole movie, Sonam Kapoor proves she cannot act to save her life. Her dialogue delivery is awful, voice modulation non-existent, expressions painfully limited and body language as well. The only saving grace is Rimi Sen, who steal whatever is left to be stolen. She is natural, funny and likeable, though even she looses her identity once the film reaches the climax.

Vulgar, pointless and sexistic, not worthy of first viewing, leave alone the second. The worst film of 2011 for sure.

"Kill the author of this review! Now"