Mann

Directed by: Indra Kumar

Starring: Aamir Khan, Manisha Koirala, Anil Kapoor, Sharmila Tagore

Released: 1999

My rating: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

I sincerely, honestly believe that the ONLY thing that ever made indra Kumar´s films work was Madhuri Dixit. Apart from Dil, which I consider a good film, even if flawed, Beta and Raja were only bearable because of her awesomeness and talent, and everything after that I have seen of his work just plain sucks. Mann is no different.

I write poetry in my spare time. Love me.

There is so much wrong with the plot! A severely mopy Sati Savitri Manisha falls in love with a cheater and a liar because he loves his grandmom. Because him being able to appreciate the old lady equals, in Manisha´s eyes, to being a good person. In fact, the character played by Aamir Khan is repulsive, unlikeable asshole and womanizer, who enjoys being creepy. The lengths he goes to while „wooing“ women would get him a restraining order in real life. Yet she falls in love with him, is jealous of girls he pays attention to, even though she has rejected him before. By the time the movie reached the interval I was ripping my hair out of frustration and sheer disbelief. Then the asshole-ish hero turns good and full of izzat overnight. How am I supposed to buy that?

"What the..."

"Do I turn you on?"

"Totally!"

In the second half of the film we are served a completely different story. That of selfless love and that you should look around before crossing the road. Manisha´s face is all swollen throughout and her glycerin-tears-stained cheeks can only be equaled by Jaya Bachchan´s from Kabhi Khusi Kabhi Ghum. Because our heroine lost both her legs! From extreme „hilarity“ the movie sinks into extreme depression, and everything is so theatrical you just wonder what has the director do to make all these good actors act so terribly. 

So hot.

I was irked by so many things in the story, but the greatest outrage was perhaps when Manisha admits to the headmistress of the orphanage (where she had grown up) that she doesn´t want to marry the cheerful and genuinely nice Anil Kapoor (whom I did not expect in the least to show up), because she loves the womanizing stalker. She is then lectured on how she has no right whatsoever to follow her heart and be actually honest with her fiancé, because, you know, there is a chance he just might turn into a lunatic and go crazy because of that. And also: certainly, if she dares to refuse him, nobody will ever marry a girl from an orphanage again. Like WTF.

"Was my moustache not pervy enough for you, biatch?"

Aamir Khan is at his annoying worst (I think I read he regretted doing the film? It would definitely make sense.) Manisha looks disturbingly ill, I had to wonder whether she had some issues with her health off screen. Comedy has never been her forte, and her tragedy is too overdone in this. Anil Kapoor comes and goes, with the only sane character to play, but being himself more than anything. Sharmila Tagore cast as Aamir Khan´s grandmother felt so wrong! The fabulous actress, who was in her fifties at the time, is unrecognizable under a deck up of at least 80 year old woman, who appears very briefly only to pile on some more depression by dying in the second half.

"I am a Cinderella waiting for a Prince."

"But when he brings a shoe he won´t recognize you since you have no legs now."

"You lil shit!"

Logic has never really had place in Indra Kumar´s universe, while annoying over the top comedy thrived. Mann, which also stole a song or two from vintage European hits (here is one and here is another) is a confused movie trying to go from comedy into a tragic romance, much like Dil, but comedy is lame and tragic romance frustrating. The first half, made up of every wrong cliché, made me uncomfortable, the second half with its mopier than mopy ridiculousness made me roll my eyes till they almost stuck on the other part of my head.

"Good luck and break a leg, like you broke my heart."

(note on captions: Sorry for lame jokes. I don´t  mind Anil´s stache. The Cinderella comment was indeed made in the film. Except the ending. Of course.)

Akele Hum Akele Tum

Directed by: Mansoor Khan

Starring: Aamir Khan, Manisha Koirala

Released: 1995

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

On some levels Akele Hum Akele Tum made me extremely happy. A sensitive, and not being all black and white in its views, story about one marriage´s failure and consequences, is not a common Bollywood (or Indian) concept for a movie. The film caught my fancy because of this venture into an unsure and unknown waters, as well as because it actually does try to show some new dimension and perspective to our heroes and heroines. At the same time the film failed me in some aspects, that are „small“, but seemed quite important to me nontheless. As usual I have not seen Kramer vs. Kramer, and American film this was based on, so there is no question of comparism from my side.

Rohit (Aamir) and Kiran (Manisha) are two beautiful young people. Bonding over their love for music, they start a relationship. And sharing the same dream – to make it big in the music industry – promises to bind them even more closely. In spite of her parents´ wishes Kiran accepts Rohit´s proposal for marriage, full of optimism and happy to have a husband, who, as she believes, will support her in her efforts. However reality hits hard. It is not easy to pursue ones dream when she has to tend her busy husband. And all dreams are all but left when she gives birth to their son. While Rohit is toiling, trying to fulfill his musical dreams, Kiran is home bound, being everything a proper wife is supposed to be: a cook, a maid, a nurse..... but unlike many a heroine, she is not happy.

Kiran is one of those rare speciments among Bollywood female characters who actually nurtures ambitions of her own and her idea of happiness does not fully equate tending family. After a while she cannot take it anymore and on verge of nervous breakdown she decides to leave her husband – and also their six years old son, and starts building a career for herself, starting in a chorus in advert jingles and ending up a top film heroine. Meanwhile her husband is all bewildered upon realizing how difficult it is to take care of household and son, and his own promising job turns sour at first, and pretty much dies a slow death....

The story is largely focused on Rohit´s part of the story and his bonding with son whom he neglected till then, while a story of one woman´s emancipation is pretty much just a background. Pity, because both the journeys in the reverse role universe would be worth exploring in detail. We don´t really see as much of Kiran as we should. We do not really feel what she feels and we don´t really know what her expectations or doubts are, apart from the beginning of the movie, when she indeed resembles just a wild animal trapped in a cage. On the other hand we do get a wonderful portrait of a father, who only without wife manages to grow up into a caring and thoughtful man. In the end it is bit of a disappointment for the viewer (or rather for me) that Kiran is indeed painted in the negative colours more than necessary. Her motives and reasons for abandoning her family are left without an attempt to make the audience understand. And while she regrets and asks for forgiveness, Rohit never even apologizes. I would rather believe „we failed each other“ statement Kiran gives rather than „I failed“ admission that is pretty violently drawn out of her a bit later.

The film ultimately belongs to Aamir Khan, who gives a stellar performance full of feeling. From frustration and anger to loving and protective as well as insecure, he gets is right, and his equation with his on screen son is wonderful. Manisha as Kiran is very good, but with less scope that I expected. Akele Hum Akele Tum thus remains a sensitive venture into human (and parental as well as child) psychology, that left me with moist eyes, but it is not exactly feminist friendly.

First Love Letter

Directed by: Shiva

Starring: Vivek Mushran, Manisha Koirala, Chunky Pandey

Released: 1991

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

I have not seen any proper 90-ish cliché film for such a long time I devoured this one without feeling guilty at all. I enjoyed it thoroughly for all it´s cheesiness. It is one of those films you should never ever show or recommend to somebody not yet used to Bollywood (especially Bollywood before Hum Aapke Hain Koun), because there are things for which not even the famous „WTF“ is enough. But as a guilty pleasure it makes for an uncomplicated and even heartwarming watch.

Some gorgeous young Manisha to feast your gaze first. The film is definitely easy on eyes.

Thakur Ajit Singh (Danny Denzongpa) is a wealthy man who has fixed his daughter´s aliance with another noble house, but the girl in question, Radha (Manisha), is not excited at all over a prospect that everything in her life has always been set up for her. Finally she manages to persuade her father to let her go for a few days into a country and there, dressed as a servant to slip pass through her bodyguards, she runs into a flute-playing milkman Shyam (Vivek). Charmed by his flute and totally gaga over the fact their names match so wonderfully she promptly falls in love with him and they spend the next thirty minutes frolicking in each others arms and roaming woods and meadows. In fear he might get scared (and heck, would he have a good reason) Radha „forgets“ to tell her boyfriend whose daughter she actually is. And when daddy shows up one day, it leads to just first of many conflicts that begin to pile as the footage moves on.

Then came a second half where lot of people would scream "Yeh nahin ho sakta" and there would be lots and lots of weeping, suffering and self-harming. There is Chunky Pandey as an unwanted husband drowning the fact he can´t sleep with Manisha in alcohol, and sporting some awesome Rishi Kapoor sweaters. There is Reema Laggoo and Dalip Tahil as life-disappointed individuals to show you how nasty Danny Denzongpa not only is, but has always been, all for the sake of his good name and wealth. There is a parrot that can easily make it into my unofficial list of overly smart animals. And there is Gulshan Grover with hair too wild to be tamed.

This deserved a screen cap. Because you know.... he´s worth it!

I genuinely loved Manisha (young and gorgeous and really good though inexperienced) and her falling in love with Vivek Mushran (totally not a hero material, but OK enough to pass off as one in something like this), it was all so cute and sweet and the songs were beautiful. It all actually made me miss the songs where hero and heroine would be literally running over the meadows, without a need to transport themselves into some more exotic location, and without any dramatic shots or editing. I wonder if we ever get to see something as simple and disarming as this again? 

It was flawed (heavily) and it was WTF (as I have warned you at the beginning), yet I do not regret watching it. The finale had me really laughing. Really. Only in Bollywood you finish the film with a lover on a burning pyre while his girl is singing a song to make it rain. And it works of course. But wait, it gets better. I think from now on the saving by a cow has to be my absolute favourite.

"Imma gonna burn for ya!"

"Calm down Manisha. Just sing and make dramatic faces. Rain will come down to put out the pyre."

"WTF who came up with this?"

I also have to proudly note that I watched this without subtitles and understood great deal of what was said and could figure out the rest. In the end this was not really any deep philosophical script. Lot´s of "RADHAAAAAAAAAAA" "MERE SHYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM" "MAIN YEH SHAADI NAHIN HO SAKTI" "TUMNE MUJHE JHOOT BOLA" "SHYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM" "RADHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" ..... you know, the basic 90s Bollywood stuff.

March 2011 releases

I rather urgently need to delete several files from my computer and the victims of this decision are to be three film which released this March. And just as my good habit goes, before deleting a film I am to write at least a short review. One of the „major“ releases is not included and that is Dum Maro Dum, simply because I have not yet found a decent picture quality copy with subtitles, so I guess a review of that film will have to wait.... Meanwhile here come the three films I´ve seen....

F.A.L.T.U.

Directed by: Remo D´Souza

Starring: Jackky Bhagnani, Pooja Gupta, Boman Irani, Riteish Deshmunk

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

To be honest I only watched this film because it was directed by Remo, whom I´ve got accostumed to see side by side with Madhuri Dixit on Jhalak Dikhla Ja 4 the last winter. Yeah, a pathetic reason, but a fangirl in me knows no limits! The only reason why I sat through the whole thing was Riteish Deshmunk. I genuinly like the guy, I find him very funny and there is something cute and endearing about him. He is also a good actor and in this is without a second thought the best together with Boman Irani – despite the fact their roles are rather limited. Most of the time you are forced to watch a bunch of teenagers, who are obviously too lazy to study, having a good time and later do some preaching about how teachers should teach..... I am all for changes in our educational systém, but I hate it when people label it all wrong. It has worked for centuries for God´s sake. Maybe I´m just interpreting the „message“ of the film wrong, because it was hard to pay any real attention to what was heppening on screen..... Some jokes might have been funny, if one didn´t realize that there is limit to silliness. And who the heck was that Google guy?

I Am

Directed by: Onir

Starring: Juhi Chawla, Manisha Koirala, Rahul Bose, Nandita Das

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

Yes, I know I have shocked you with such a low rating of such a highly critically acclaimed film. But it was the high expectations coming from those critical accolades and praises which made my psyched about I Am long before it released, and then I found out it is actually nothing that special... Onir made a quality film, interestingly put together, with very good performances from everybody. It is always pleasure to see Juhi Chawla, even more so in these kind of mature roles, and it was just as great to see Manisha Koirala again. Rahul Bose, who failed to impress me in Chameli, delivers yet again a rather subdued performance, which yet again leaves me with an impression of him being constantly confused on screen. My problem with the film was that I did not really find it „eye-opening“, the word which critics largely used. Everybody with brains (hence everyone who would watch such a film) knows there are single women who go to spermbanks, that there are people who would never accept gays, that there are molested children. The film says that these things exist. And that´s all. All four stories are hardly related to each other, in fact they seemed rather forcibly put together, and their length (or rather shortness) did not give me a chance to feel into the characters, or even like them. It was all too shallow, simple „touch and run away“.

Game

Directed by: Abhinay Deo

Starring: Abhishek Bachchan, Kangana Ranaut, Anupam Kher

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

This one was a surprise. I am one of those who think Abhishek Bachchan simply lucked out because of his surname, and I maintain this belief. But there are films where he proves he is a capable actor too and Game is one of those. In fact, I really, really liked the first 45 minutes. The way the story was presented was nothing less but exciting for me. But once the EXCELLENT Anupam Kher disappeared from the film, it went down the hill. Maybe also because really good Boman Irani was too very soon eliminated from the story. From a very promising plot, which was well built up at first, the movie in mere minutes transformed into mediocre thriller with terribly placed background music and a speed of a snail. Abhishek is quite good, although I don´t understand why he has to play a "genius" so often, because seriously, he doesnt convince you of being one. Kangana, I feel, is a one time wonder. I recall how astounded I was by her in Fashion, but since then my rating of her as an actress sloops lower and lower everytime I see her. In this she is the weekest and yet again doesn´t really make me want to go and watch her some more. Lots of stories are left unfinished in this. Pity? Good? Not quite sure.