R... Rajkumar

Directed by: Prabhudeva

Starring: Shahid Kapoor, Sonu Sood, Sonakshi Sinha

Released: 2013

My rating: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

It goes without saying that Prabhudeva the director is stuck somewhere in the 90s and he seems to be immensely happy there. Which explains why, much like his previous movie Ramaiya Vastavaiya, R... Rajkumar doesn´t bring anything new or unexpected to the table. That in itself doesn´t mean that much, after all even movies that take a tried and tested formula can manage to be entertaining, and that, in the end, is really what counts. R... Rajkumar is good and enjoyable in bits, but overall I felt it was extremely random. In fact, it reminded one of those (in)famous Bollywood subplots that hop along the main story, just the main story here was completely edited out. You are left with comic sidekicks and romantic flavouring, but the great conflict that would be the driving machine of the film is omitted.

Stuff just happens in this story. Whatever little of actual motivation and reason is there gets introduced way too late for you not to question it. Who is this Rajkumar dude for the starters? He just randomly appears among two mortal enemies (one of whom is my favourite Sonu Sood) who try to dominate the trade of opium in some rural area, joins the gang of one and falls for the niece of the other (and since we are technically in the 90s this is the eternal and solid love at the first sight). Trouble only starts when the two gang leaders join hands and decide that the niece be shaadied to Sonu. After beating up all his goons our Rajkumar then declares he is "asli mard" who could take the gal away immediately but instead decides to marry her on the day decided for Sonu´s wedding. (aka he is a douche who doesn´t wanna pay for the wedding. So manly, yo.)

There is lots of beating goondas up and lots of threats that nobody cares for and the finale is over-dragged festival of (actually pretty gore) fighting between the hero and the villain while Sonakshi gets to stand aside and cry without a sound the whole time. The end is as random as the rest of the movie. What happened to Rajkumar and his lady love? From what I understand he is in drug business and just killed his boss. And she is a niece of a drug dealer too. Like... do they take over now, move to Kuala Lumpur, sell opium and drink champaigne with Russian mafia or what?

The stronger points of the movie are Shahid Kapoor and Sonu Sood, and - if you manage to surpress your frustration over such voluntarily waste of talent - Sonakshi Sinha. Soundtrack is good with already notorious Saree Ka Fall Sa being the best of the lot and mad fun to watch on screen. Shahid and Sonakshi are not at all a bad couple. While he seems quite natural throughout (and shows why he is the best male dancer in the industry), Sonakshi is slowly killing herself with her pathetic movie choices. Whatever she shows we have already seen, and not just once. The girl has it all and yet, she is now so incredibly boring to watch I could cry. I cannot even tell her characters apart (with the exception of Lootera) anymore. She is utterly gorgeous, but I wonder how long that will be saving her. Sonu Sood is a darling and proves yet again both his awesome physique as well as good comic timing. I would have married him.

R... Rajkumar is a timepass you cannot take seriously, and as such it can fulfill the ultimate goal of any movie: to entertain. If you love it, good for you, just don´t try to pass it onto others as great and quality cinema.

Dabangg

Directed by: Abhinav Kashyap

Starring: Salman Khan, Sonu Sood, Sonakshi Sinha, Arbaaz Khan, Dimple Kapadia, Vinod Khanna, Anupam Kher

Released: 2010

Verdict: destroy every copy – horrible – bad – whatever – flawed but enjoyable - good – great – amazing

I am no Salman Khan fan. I genuinly love some of his films from the 90s, but that usually has hardly anything to do with him. Instead the films he stars in either have some other great actor or actress (like in the case of let´s say Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam), or are simply perfectly made (like Bhansali´s Khamoshi). There are several movies I like because of him (Andaaz Apna Apna anyone?), but they are rather rare cases. Unlike many others I do not care for Salman´s personal life and I do not feel the need to hate on him just because he and Shahrukh don´t get along, the truth is I simply don´t find him an actor powerful or convincing enough. There is X-factor more at work than talent, although he has (had?) plenty of it when he was younger. The older he gets the more lazy he gets. Hardly ever challenges himself, he doesn´t wander from his comfort zone, and he is one of those who will repeat the same formula again and again as long as somebody watches. So as you can see I am no Salman Khan fan. And yet after watching Dabangg I wanted to turn into one!

Prem is dead. Long live Chulbul.

Dabangg is a cinematic entertainment of the first class. Clever and witty, full of effortless comedy, action-packed sequences, beautiful songs and if I should use the atrocious clichéd saying, there is something for everybody. And the main hero is a real treat. Chulbul Pandey calls himself with gusto „Robin Hood“, but unlike the medieval European bandit who robbed the rich and gave all to the poor, he robs the robbers and keeps the loot to himself. In a way I was astounded to see how corrupt Chulbul actually is and nobody seems to mind. I guess the general perception of policemen is that they are all corrupt, and apparently as long as you are as righteous towards others as Chulbul you can afford it. There are other things that make him a sympathetic character. He is neglected by his step-father who naturally spoils his own son Makhi, he is devoted to his Maa, and finally he is loveable in his goofiness when it comes to his lady love (incredibly fresh and charming Sonakshi Sinha). Chulbul is Dabangg. Chulbul is what the whole film is about.

Bit of a Freddie Mercury style can never hurt.

When his younger brother Makhi steals some of the money Chulbul kept from himself, he has no idea they belonged to another wretchedly corrupt person – a politician Chedi Singh (Sonu Sood), and he naturally wants it back. He also wants to destroy Chulbul, who has made his life rather uncomfortable after finding out that some of his dark deeds harm the common folk (basically you can steal as long as nobody knows or comes to harm – that seems to be the moral of the story). And after Chulbul interrups Malaika Arora´s hot item number with some of his own awesome steps and pelvic thrusts, Chedi stops to control his own hatred....

Let´s shake it bhabhi!

The thrill, the family drama, the kick-ass action, the adorable romance and political plotting are intertwined just spectacularly. Painted with pleasant, earthy colours and tones and framed with melodious songs, the film is actually beautiful from every angle. True enough, over the years we have grown tired of the sudden stop of the hero in the air while he´s beating the heck up of the bad guys ala Matrix, but somehow Dabangg manages to present them as cool, something not all those who use the trick are able to do. There are memorable dialogues („I am going to make so many holes in you, that you are going to get confused where to breathe from and where to fart from“) and memorable scenes, and for the first time ever Salman doesn´t take off his shirt. Instead the shirt takes off itself.

I´m too sexy for my shirt!

I won the best stripper award six years in a row!

Are you kidding me?

As I have already noted, Chulbul is one of Salman´s best performances. He is unusually (for him) convincing and one can see the role was tailor made for him. His charisma and body language are wonderfully in sync with the character and he definitely deserves all the praise he received for it and more. Where is Salman, there needs to be an arm-candy as well. Debuting Sonakshi Sinha doesn´t have a big or deep role. She is what is demanded of a heroine. Beautiful, young, sweet. We can argue about how overrated she is (or is not) by media as we are waiting for her to act in something else, but the fact remains she did exceedingly well with whatever she was given. She definitely has the best dialogue delivery among the leading ladies who were launched in the last 5 years, and she has a pleasant, expressive face. She refused to be lost in Salman´s larger than life image and in spite of everything made her presence known. 

My hope for brighter Bollywood future.

Arbaaz Khan, who is one of the most wooden actors I´ve seen, finally found himself. Supporting role of a village lazybum, who is not evil, but not exactly saint or clever either, did for him what Chulbul did for Salman: it made him seem a great actor. For the first time ever I found him completely natural and at ease in front of the camera. The supporting cast overall did a good job, even though sentiments could hurt at a bit when you realize Dimple Kapadia plays Salman´s mother alongside Vinod Khanna. For me she will always be that young girl unashamedly opening door for Rishi Kapoor dressed inocently inapropriate.....

Pocket money time.

It´s difficult to label anything as a modern day classic. People are bound to disagree and some will slam you for your inferior opinion, and of course only the future years can really show if your guess was wrong or right, but somehow I have a feeling Dabangg deserves to be on the list of „modern classics“ for the pure fun and entertainment it represents. Also because even though it´s a massala and Salman Khan film, you do not need to leave your brain at home. And even though my undying devotion lies with Shahrukh Khan, I dare say Dabangg was the best film of the whole 2010, leaving its "chief rival" My name is Khan far behind.